Fandomposting 4.5.

Having a writing project I really don't feel like discussing in public is really revealing to me how much of me doing anything in fandom is me putting out bids for connection, wanting people to come talk to me about whatever it is I'm doing. A lot of me Doing Fandom is just me Being In Public, with an easy open communication channel anyone can engage with because from my perspective I've given a really clear communication channel for how to start a conversation with me. "Hello, fandom: here's what I'm currently thinking about."

This is also why I will occasionally just pop on Tumblr to post whatever current fannish thought is at the top of my head, liveblogging my emotional state while engaging with something. I want people to come talk to me about whatever I'm currently talking about. That's why I'm doing it in public.

Contrasting it to my current fic, which I absolutely do not want to discuss without first screening people I wanna discuss it with for hangups and squicks, and the difference between the two is pretty startling. I'm totally capable of being out of my mind about something in private, and so whenever I am in public about it constitutes an almost totally different mode of communication in my head. It's just that this process is invisible because there's not exactly an "how many times an hour Van texted people on Discord instead of posting on Tumblr" counter up next to my user name on the sites where I engage in fandomposting, lmao