Okay, I literally tried to have the "did Thanos love Gamorrah?" conversation with one of my good friends after we saw Infinity War, and she said he absolutely did not and I said he did and then she had to #nope out of the conversation because it was triggering for her to consider that he actually did feel love. Which is like... understandable? Although it was very frustrating for me not to be able to talk about something as simple as character motivation and also something something I think there's some fuzzy crossover with aphobia in the very reactionary idea that bad people don't feel love, and those who don't feel love use other people.
But yes, for me, Thanos absolutely felt love. I haven't seen Endgame or either of the Gardians movies, for context. But it's like... people keep holding the act of his killing his own daughter to be this morally unambiguous Horrible Thing which only loveless monsters could be capable of.
I'm rewatching Hannibal right now for the dozenth time and the first serial killer literally has the motivation of wanting to kill his own daughter out of love! And the way the show explores that and the way that desire manifests in his murders is beautiful and poetic. I think people are so fucking unwilling to understand that sacrifice is about elevation. Serial killer dad is a hunter who honors every piece of the animals/people he kills by eating the meat, selling the fur, carving the bones, etc, and he doesn't compartmentalize between "this doe was beautiful in life" and "I killed her and am going to eat her" (the way his daughter does), but instead essentially blesses her death for allowing his family to live, and repays that kindness of her's by honoring her.
So again........ it's so "easy" for Thanos to push Gamorrah because he has a higher purpose which, if fulfilled, will honor her and elevate her to levels of holy martyrdom. "I have to sacrifice my loved one so something greater/more beneficial to humanity can happen" is a trope that appears all the time for protagonists, so why is it only fucked up for villains? And if there's more concrete abuse explored in the Guardians movie I don't know about, it's pretty irrelevant, because whether or not somebody abuses the object of their love says nothing about whether they do in fact feel love.
And honestly, hot take, but I think motivation does matter in abuse--at least it does for me, as a victim. There was one day at work when I got treated like crap by two of my coworkers and yet here I am down the line and I genuinely like one of them a lot, whereas the other is the scum of the earth, and it comes down to their motivations in lashing out at me. And even though my parents were horrible parents, I nonetheless recognize the ways in which they loved me and failed to translate that love into something that met my needs, and it would be dishonest of me to say that none of that mattered just because it fucked me up, because the fact that they love me--even if I feel they don't actually know me--does matter.
Do I think it's utterly ridiculous that the side of good never wavers from treating "kill half the universe" as a legitimate but misguided opinion that should be debated? Yes. Do I think Thanos's whole plan and logic is flimsy and poorly written and the least compelling philosophy 101 shit there is, and that it pales in comparison to his original story in the comics? Yes. But will I refuse to believe that somebody could kill the person they love, and potentially even see the act of killing as noble and a horrific necessity in the face of (supposedly) benefiting the entire universe? No.
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But yes, for me, Thanos absolutely felt love. I haven't seen Endgame or either of the Gardians movies, for context. But it's like... people keep holding the act of his killing his own daughter to be this morally unambiguous Horrible Thing which only loveless monsters could be capable of.
I'm rewatching Hannibal right now for the dozenth time and the first serial killer literally has the motivation of wanting to kill his own daughter out of love! And the way the show explores that and the way that desire manifests in his murders is beautiful and poetic. I think people are so fucking unwilling to understand that sacrifice is about elevation. Serial killer dad is a hunter who honors every piece of the animals/people he kills by eating the meat, selling the fur, carving the bones, etc, and he doesn't compartmentalize between "this doe was beautiful in life" and "I killed her and am going to eat her" (the way his daughter does), but instead essentially blesses her death for allowing his family to live, and repays that kindness of her's by honoring her.
So again........ it's so "easy" for Thanos to push Gamorrah because he has a higher purpose which, if fulfilled, will honor her and elevate her to levels of holy martyrdom. "I have to sacrifice my loved one so something greater/more beneficial to humanity can happen" is a trope that appears all the time for protagonists, so why is it only fucked up for villains? And if there's more concrete abuse explored in the Guardians movie I don't know about, it's pretty irrelevant, because whether or not somebody abuses the object of their love says nothing about whether they do in fact feel love.
And honestly, hot take, but I think motivation does matter in abuse--at least it does for me, as a victim. There was one day at work when I got treated like crap by two of my coworkers and yet here I am down the line and I genuinely like one of them a lot, whereas the other is the scum of the earth, and it comes down to their motivations in lashing out at me. And even though my parents were horrible parents, I nonetheless recognize the ways in which they loved me and failed to translate that love into something that met my needs, and it would be dishonest of me to say that none of that mattered just because it fucked me up, because the fact that they love me--even if I feel they don't actually know me--does matter.
Do I think it's utterly ridiculous that the side of good never wavers from treating "kill half the universe" as a legitimate but misguided opinion that should be debated? Yes. Do I think Thanos's whole plan and logic is flimsy and poorly written and the least compelling philosophy 101 shit there is, and that it pales in comparison to his original story in the comics? Yes. But will I refuse to believe that somebody could kill the person they love, and potentially even see the act of killing as noble and a horrific necessity in the face of (supposedly) benefiting the entire universe? No.